It was afternoon and both sisters were in their bedroom. She took the opportunity that both were at the same place to ask if she could play with the sister's Barbie doll. The sister, sitting on the bed, took the Barbie doll and started to comb its hair, apparently very focused, not making eye-contact with the younger sibling. She moves closer to the bed, looking at what the sister is doing and repeats the question. The sister replies, "you have your own toys" and goes back to the hair care of the doll.
The answer caused an undistinguished mix of sadness, anger and frustration that made her stiff and numb, as if her body had turned into a wooden board.
The night came and the room was dark. The sister was elsewhere, probably watching a film in the living room. She was all alone in the room. The Barbie was also there. She knew it. Without turning the lights on, she smoothly but surely walked towards the end of the bed where the doll was placed. She looked at it: so available for her play. She sat on the floor, very close to the bed, but not on it as she didn't dare to sit on it. Her gaze was fixed on the doll. She stretched her arms and took it with both hands, bringing it closer to her. Her upper waist was straight and her chest was leaning towards Barbie: the girl felt proud of having it in her hands. She looks at it carefully, analysing the head; the ears; the neck; the arm pits and how it feels moving the arms front and backwards; the waist; the hips and connection to legs; the non-articulated legs; the feet.
She was aware of sounds coming from outside the room. They were coming from the corridor which connected the room to the living room to the toilet. Every sound approaching the room was noticed and feared with her whole body. She was alert bending her waist every time outside sound was made, checking whether someone was about to approach the room. She not only feared that the sister could get in, she was also concerned that anyone could announce that she was there by talking to her and asking questions about what she was doing there in the dark. She knew she couldn't be there for long. She is getting every time more nervous and her heart is beating fast. She knew and sensed that she couldn't be with Barbie for long. She should end the moment and say goodbye.
She had the urge of making the moment longer. She started biting the doll's foot. It feels good on her teeth. It had a gentle feel of smoothness with a slight taste of rubberized plastic. She tastes it in her saliva. She moves to the next foot feeling as the natural next step. She enjoys the slow pace of chewing, from front to lateral teeth. It felt enough and she put the doll back in the bed where it was before. She leaves the room feeling light and silently victorious.